Right now, metal’s crown prince of darkness Ozzy Osbourne is preparing to release his 13th studio album, Patient Number 9. We’ve already heard one track from the record, the incredibly heavy title track; now we’re getting a taste of a second single, this one titled “Degradation Blues” and featuring Black Sabbath guitarist Tony Iommi. But unlike the last track, this song isn’t about madness, or despair, or the dark corners of the mind — nope, it’s about jackin’ it too often!
When we first heard the chorus of “Degradation Rules” and heard Ozzy yell, “Asphyxiation! Masturbation!”, we didn’t think much of it, because bands have been working the word masturbation into songs to fix a rhyme since Hector was a pup (usually it’s some weird twist on the phrase, like mental masturbation). But no, then Ozzy goes on to talk about “sticky little magazines,” and even says, “The hand that beats you also makes you blind.” We’re about 99.999% positive this song is about the Sin of Onan.
Check out the track below, just keep the door open. Ozzy’s new record Patient Number 9 drops September 9th — hey, 9 on 9/9! Cool, like an inverted 666! — and is available for preorder. Meanwhile, the following dates on Ozzy’s farewell tour are still on schedule:
May 2023
Wed 3 | Finland, Helsinki | Hartwall Arena [tickets]
Fri 5 | Sweden, Stockholm | Friends Arena [tickets]
Sun 7 | Germany, Dortmund | Westfalenhalle [tickets]
Wed 10 | Spain, Madrid | WiZink Center [tickets]
Fri 12 | Italy, Bologna | Unipol Arena [tickets]
Sun 14 | Germany, Munich | Olympiahalle [tickets]
Wed 17 | Hungary, Budapest | Budapest Arena [tickets]
Fri 19 | Czech Republic | Prague | O2 Arena [tickets]
Sun 21 | Switzerland, Zurich | Hallenstadion [tickets]
Wed 24 | Germany, Hamburg | Barclaycard Arena [tickets]
Fri 26 | Germany, Mannheim | SAP Arena [tickets]
Sun 28 | Germany, Berlin | Mercedes-Benz Arena [tickets]
Wed 31 | UK, Nottingham | Motorpoint Arena [tickets]
June 2023
Fri 2 | UK, Newcastle | Utilita Arena [tickets]
Sun 4 | UK, Glasgow | Ovo Hydro [tickets]
Wed 7 | UK, Manchester | AO Arena [tickets]
Sat 10 | Ireland, Dublin | 3 Arena [tickets]
Mon 12 | UK, London | O2 Arena [tickets]
Wed 14 | UK, Birmingham | Resorts World Arena [tickets]